Not in the Model Minority
Q I am a low-income, working-class Indian now living in California. I do not fit the model-minority picture of the upwardly mobile, educated, or business-savvy South Asian immigrant. Unfortunately, I have discovered that Indians can be pretty class-oriented and quick to categorize and judge based on income and education. In fact, their lifestyle starts looking quite shallow and materialistic. I find it hard to be a part of the community with these attitudes and values.
A In the last few years I have received a few emails from the South Asian community sharing similar perceptions and viewpoints. It’s important for those who don’t fit the stereotype to speak up, although, when you are not part of the dominant group with some of the privileges of higher education and income, it is harder to voice your opinion. You simply don’t feel as entitled and can be more afraid of ridicule and being discounted. I am sure this makes you angry. Caste and class have been a part of most cultures for centuries and do not dissolve from our psyches and societies so quickly. They have only recently been challenged as we try to move into more egalitarian values and social structures.
I wonder if the immigrants who come to the United States to seek more opportunity have a particular drive for material success. Is this narrow group of Indian Americans defined by these values that keep them comparing and judging by the standards of outer success?
I find that those who have been materially successful are finding their lives devoid of deep meaning, and find little time to enjoy things. The shell of outer success doesn’t satisfy deeper needs and fulfillment. More families are recognizing this, often through painful ways. Some Indians who have lived in the States for many years are returning to India because they want to be close to family, their traditions, and have their children learn about their heritage by living in it more fully.
The good news is that the younger generation of Indian Americans, particularly if they have been here awhile, or were born in the States, are more oriented toward deeper values and interests. They are seeking a connection to their roots and are looking at what is it to be an Indian in the West. Obviously there is no one definition; however, the fact that this question is being consciously asked, in and of itself reveals an interest in claiming their Indian heritage while being American.
Look for that connection in Indian philosophy, arts, and music, that carry much richness. There are venues in the SF Bay Area that are often affordable and quite accessible. Americans are also sponsoring events and speakers who represent the more authentic and deeper aspects of the Indian culture and are speaking about the social challenges present. Seek out those who share your cultural leanings, regardless of where they are from.
Alzak Amlani, Ph.D., is a counseling psychologist in the Bay Area. 650-325-8393. Visit www.wholenesstherapy.com.
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Comments
Thanks for publishing this column Azlak! Its definitely food for thought.
I would like to mention as an addendum to my first post, that growing up in a so called "priviliged" South Asian American community in the East Coast was and is not a bed of roses. I have the same level of education and success as many of these upwardly mobile business savvy desis and find myself unable to stomach or relate to their shallowness and materialism. Instead, I have moved on and forging my own path and striving to take the best aspects of Indian and American culture. I am truly grateful for the opportunities I have been given, but always maintain my humility and give back something to my respective communities through volunteering for good causes.
Thanks Alzak for your response. It was sensitive and thoughtful. As a social scientist and a social worker I've had to deal with clueless immigrants and Americans of all kinds. Some cannot believe that there are South Asian immigrants and SA Americans who are actually homeless, bankrupt or are living in awful conditions.
I was actually teased by some non-SA social workers for attending a conference on "funding for needy families". They wanted to know what I was doing there because "everybody", they claimed, "knew that no South Asian family was ever poor!" What terrible stereotyping!
One young Punjabi boy was constantly harassed by his neighbors because he was a minority within a minority, while also being overlooked by his richer family and community members because he was poor and lived in a ghetto. He was isolated not only by his ethnicity but also by his class.
I asked a well off Gujarati highschool teen, who did well at school and did some voluntary community work, to help this boy out by being his "big brother and his mentor". It was a great match. They taught each other their mother tongue, while becoming great buddies. The kid started doing better in school, improved his confidence and identified himself as a Punjabi Indian proudly. Before that he was trying to be White, Black and Latino all at the same time...confusing himself and others. The mentor took his knowledge to his upper class neighborhood and helped start a "big brother" program for Indian kids. I wonder if it is still going on?
Lets not deny that this materialism is everywhere. I've seen it among the second generation too. Some want to spend $300 on shoes but give little to kids in villages and poor homes. I was shocked at how the rich in East Asia spend their money these days. In Florida there were eighty year olds having plastic surgeries to look like an ulgy 40, or to date women in their 30s. Many of them did not give a penny for their grandchildren's education, and they vote for creeps like Newt.
I have been a social worker long enough, unlike many in the engineering or voluntary work field, to realize that there is nothing wrong in poor people "wanting stuff or needing stuff". I feel happy when poor people in the slums of India come up to me to show off their scooters or cell phones. They say, "Madam jee, see what I have!", and hold it up to share their hard earned stuff. One guy even carried his scooter like a baby for a few days. It was silly and sad, but cute. That is what deprivation does.
I am lucky to have had material things and love...which is why leaving your family or losing it can be hard in a place where reciprocity and support is not easy for immigrants or minorities...especially when they are dealing with social problems that are acute, complex and getting complicated by the minute.
Butr I always tell people that their things will not make them happy - though they must enjoy it, recycle it and share it while they have it. I specificually reprimand them for being rude or dismissive towards those who don't have things. America blames the poor in the worst way possible...by calling them lazy, unintelligent or pathological. How mean can the mainstream in a rich society be?
I ask everyone to appreciate those who choose not to have many or certain things though they could. I also educate people on limits, budgeting, planning and nurturing relationships. We all struggle to do that. Let us not assume that everyone should be Mother Teresa in white or Mrs. Ambani in Gold head-to- toe. There is something in-between! How do we get there is the biggest challenge? And that too without giving up our non-material values, social service or community work, ethics and humanity.
Thank goodness I became a social worker in my early 20s and saw the painful reality of poverty and deprivation up close. Many of your readers are just learning! Welcome to reality 901 and community work 101!
Thanks for posting this Alzak! I wish more people knew how to support and appreciate our social workers and activists better. Some of them on this site do not even have the basic humanity to understand how horrible "a rape threat" can be. I hate saying this on an open mail. But I am ashamed of people like Sharmila Mookerjee. These are the clueless unkind people who make India and Indians backward. Her letter denouncing what I shared boldly in one of the letters was hurtful, shocking and despicable. With such clueless morons classism, racism and colonialism are not going to be solved that easily.
I wish you, the letter writer and Leena well!
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